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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29450241">how to say i love you without saying it</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/principissa/pseuds/principissa'>principissa</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Trese (Comics)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Maliksi is a dumbass, Muh boi maliksi, Valentine's Day Prompt, alex is oblivious, not really - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:42:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,375</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29450241</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/principissa/pseuds/principissa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>when it all comes down to it, does it really have to be those specific three words and eight letters? or can you change it to mean the same thing?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Maliksi/Alexandra Trese</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>how to say i love you without saying it</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is my first work on AO3, in fanfiction, and everything on here in general so I'm both so excited and nervous. I have no beta reader so all mistakes here are solely done by my dumb ass.</p><p>Disclaimer: If you know it, I don't own it. The characters belong to Sir Budjette Tan and Sir Kajo Baldisimo.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first time he said it, it was completely by accident and he blamed his previous main squeeze who coerced him into watching a “classic” film. For him, classic meant The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. Not the Princess Bride. But he was hoping to Netflix and Chill, and after watching it, he got what he came for. But not before begrudgingly admitting that the movie had a charm of its own.</p><p>“You gotta admit, this isn’t the first time you’ve seen me shirtless.” Maliksi grinned at her, mischief apparent in his eyes. He gave her a grin, but he knew it wouldn’t dazzle her. His mouth was currently lined with blood. Besides, the look she gave him looked like she’s fighting back the urge to stab him.</p><p>He spat on the other side of the bed, blood staining the carpet. Holding the Mercuro sigil over his chest, she muttered the incantations. While the wound itself closed, there was still blood everywhere. When she was done she stepped back to inspect her work. “Try not to get killed again, Maliksi.” She admonished him, her hands covered in his blood. “I’m not your personal doctor.”</p><p>“But I can’t exactly see you whenever I want to, can I?”</p><p>“So almost dying is your idea?”</p><p>“Well, not really. I was thinking more like a candle-lit dinner, looking at the stars. All the romantic shit. I mean, it’s Valentine's day after all. But you’re working so I thought I should too. Still, if this is what I can get then I’ll say that I did it on purpose.” </p><p>She stared at him.</p><p>“Oh c’mon Alexandra. Lighten up. I’m fine, you fixed me up. I’ll forever be in your debt.”</p><p>“That’s exactly what I don’t want,” she replied, making him wince. If it was in pain or because of her words she didn’t really think about it because she stepped forward again looking over his chest. “You rest. No heroics. Unless you want me to stab you myself.”</p><p>“There’s concern somewhere in that sentence.” Maliksi pointed out. Alex rolled her eyes, “I’d like it if you stop putting words in my mouth.”</p><p>“Well, I’d like to put something else against that mouth - that wasn’t a crude joke! I meant my lips! My lips! Please put your knife away! Jeez, Alexandra. Way to break my heart. I’ve had enough of pointy things my way.” He sat up but the sudden movement made his vision spin. Alex was by his side immediately, knife hidden, and made him lie back down.</p><p>“I mean it, Maliksi. Rest.” She warned. </p><p>“Fine.” He mumbled, closing his eyes to stop the room from spinning. “I still owe you though.”</p><p>“You don’t owe me anything. Now rest.”</p><p>“As you wish.”</p><p>It was not a surprise that she didn’t react.</p>
<hr/><p>The second time came out as a joke. Harmless totally did not mean it kind of a joke. Again, he blamed that blasted woman for putting it in his head that it meant something more than what it actually was. <em>It’s what’s between the lines.</em></p><p>“What. Did. I. Tell. You?!” If it was a mixture of adrenalin, anger, and the fact that he was bleeding again and he made no move to fight her off that ended up with her shoving him against the wall. “As much as I think this is hot Alexandra — you’re kinda getting blurry.” He slurred, hanging his head, his hair falling over his eyes. Grunting, Alex nodded to the Kambal who hauled him up the stairs. “I’m sorry guys. You’re both handsome and all, but my heart is with Alex.” He tried to joke but ended up coughing up blood.</p><p>“You’re making a mess on the floor,” Crispin told him, only making Mal snicker.</p><p>They didn’t speak until they reached a spare room and the twins practically dumped Mal onto the bed. “You know I like it rough?” He wondered and Alex let out a long sigh. Leave it to Maliksi to make sexual jokes when he is practically a breath away from dying. Again.</p><p>“You know, we gotta stop meeting like this.” Her eyes snapped up to him realizing that he was talking to her. The Kambal was gone, most likely downstairs with Hank. “You have to stop dying on me, Maliksi.” She said. He sent her a wry grin. “Worried much, Alexandra?”</p><p>“I could just leave you here you know.”</p><p>“But you wouldn’t.” He grew serious and Alex had to fight back a retort. He was right though, for numerous reasons. But one of them was that she didn’t really want him to die. At least not in her spare room, she tried to reason to herself.</p><p>Getting down to business, she tore open his button-up and assessed the damage. Gunshots were common injuries she had dealt with before but not to a Tikbalang. They were supposed to be fast. And yet here he was.<br/>
“What did you get yourself into this time?” She asked, hoping that he didn’t lose too much blood from his trip from the pier to the Diabolical. She also needed him to be awake.</p><p>“Taga-dagat.”</p><p>“And you went out there on your own?” The audacity of this man-child. Or man-foal.</p><p>“I couldn't very well call you—” he coughed, “I mean, I did, diba? You didn’t answer.”</p><p>“Don’t put it on me, Maliksi. You called but at least you could’ve waited instead of diving into business with beings out of your league.”<br/>
“I don’t know if you’re worried or not.” He mumbled, sending her a sheepish grin that only aggravated her. She didn’t depend on the Mercuro sigil too much, some wounds are good to heal on their own. It also takes her life force when doing so. Instead, she produced tools to remove the bullet lodged to his side and shoulder before healing him.</p><p>“You’re welcome to stay the night.” She told him as soon as she was done.</p><p>“As long as you promise not to sneak in here later and have your way with me.” He replied.</p><p><em>He’ll be fine.</em> She thought to herself. If that was any indication if he’s still by death’s door.</p><p>“Maliksi.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Get some rest.” Her voice firm as she closed the door behind her.</p><p>“As you wish.”</p><p>Maybe she didn’t get it.</p>
<hr/><p>“I’m not dying this time.” He told her, hands raised surrendering.</p><p>“What are you doing here?” She hissed, hiding in the shadows. It was supposed to be a simple meeting between two aswang gangs. She already have the Kambal with her, she doesn’t need another bodyguard. Or rather, she didn’t need someone to get distracted.</p><p>And Maliksi is a huge distraction.</p><p>“I thought I could tag along. Extra muscle and all that.” He reasoned, shrugging nonchalantly giving Alex an early aura of a migraine. “Go home, Maliksi. We have this covered.”</p><p>“Boss, it might be a good idea…” Alex raised a brow at Basilio. “Crispin and I can be back up, while you and Maliksi can head on up the meeting. In case of emergency—”</p><p>“Let’s not hope it comes to that.” Maliksi supplied, a little too hopeful.</p><p>“—we’ll come down raining bullets. But it’s not a bad idea to have an extra pair of muscles. We’ve seen Maliksi fight. He’s rusty—”</p><p>“Hey!” He interjected while the twins and Alex ignored him.</p><p>“—but he can carry his own.”</p><p>“I’ll take those backhanded compliments.” Maliksi could almost jump with glee. A mission, with Alexandra! It was like a date if not for the aswang gangs in the current peace negotiations. “How about it?”</p><p>“Fine. But you follow my lead, got it? I don’t want you running around fucking it up.”</p><p>“You know I always like it when a woman takes control.” At her look at him, “Too sexual? Do I need to tone it down?” He turned to the Kambal. </p><p>“Just a bit.” Crispin replied.</p><p>“Unless you want to be castrated here and now.” Basilio added. Maliksi nodded, before gesturing for Alex to lead him to where the talks were about to take place.</p><p>The negotiations were uneventful, much to Maliksi’s dismay. He wanted a piece of the action. Maybe be a knight in shining armor for Alex. But if he was being honest, it would most likely be the other way around.</p><p>“Hey, I was right, you know.” He started talking as soon as they left the dilapidated building.</p><p>“About what?”</p><p>“I didn’t die this time.” He shot her a lopsided grin.</p><p>Alex couldn’t help but shake her head, the smallest of smiles flashing on her face. If Maliksi wasn’t watching her intensely, he would’ve missed it. But this was Alexandra Trese they were talking about. His attention was solely on her. “That you didn’t.”</p><p>“The four of us make a pretty good team. Maybe next time—”</p><p>“Don’t even finish that sentence, I’m going to stop you right there.” She turned to him, looking up with a serious expression on her face. “You’re a distraction.”</p><p>“I know how handsome I am, Alexandra. People get distracted when looking at me all the time.”</p><p>“You know what I mean.” Her voice was even but there something in her eyes that made him shut up. “I can’t do my job with you lingering about. In order to keep the balance of the underworld, I have rules. Rules that would go out the window if the TIkbalang clan decided to forgo the agreements because of your death.” He was about to reply when she raised a hand indicating that she wasn’t done. “You’re untrained, stubborn and reckless. I can’t have that.</p><p>“So no. You can’t tag along anymore, Maliksi. And that’s final.” She told him in a way like how a mother would scold a petulant child.</p><p>“As you wish.”</p><p>He’s sure she doesn’t get it.</p>
<hr/><p>“At least this time, you’re not dying.” He wasn’t surprised when he heard her voice behind him. Even here where they were surrounded, he knows exactly where she is. It was like his whole being would seek her out in the room and made him hyper aware of her movements.</p><p>“Not yet anyway.” He quipped as he turned to face her, internally squealing with glee as she glared at him with his words. She cares. He knows it. She knows it. But she wasn’t going to tell him that. No, he knows her, well enough to know that she shows more than she says.</p><p>“Busy night?” He asked, noting that she relaxed at his question. He wasn’t going to push her. Not until she’s ready. And as much as he hates it, he’s willing to wait. For her.</p><p>“Well, it’s Friday.” She replied, “And happy hour.”</p><p>“Hey, happy hour? There weren’t any changes on the price or any free drinks at all.” He almost whined. Not that he needed to be frugal. She merely smirked at him, “Well, except for you.”</p><p>Maliksi chuckled, “Why Alexandra, you never cease to amaze me. Singling me out, just because what? I have money to spend?”</p><p>“Of course. I need to milk you dry.”</p><p>“You could always say please.”</p><p>“Where’s the fun in that?”</p><p>It shocked him to say the least. They were having a conversation that didn’t end up with him fainting from blood loss or her telling him off. Was this flirting? Or was he reading too much into this? He didn’t want to ruin anything by saying something crude enough to make her stalk off.</p><p>“You know, I never thought you’d be the one to think.” Alex commented, taking a sip of her coffee. He looked at her incredulously. “Hey, I have a brain. It works. Sometimes.”</p><p>Maliksi almost thought it was a dream when Alex chuckled. It wasn’t a laugh, but he’ll take what he can get. A chuckle was just a start. “Let me buy you a drink.” He blurted out, “I know you own the place, but still.” He hastily added. Alex only gave him a small twitch of her mouth that was like a smile she’s trying to suppress. “I could just tell Hank to give you a drink on the house. But again, I need you to actually pay up.”</p><p>“Business that slow?” He joked.</p><p>“Quite the opposite. But again, you’re an exemption.”</p><p>“My, my, Alexandra. I’m a lot of things to you these days. A patient, a hired muscle, a distraction, a cash cow and an exemption.” He commented, watching her face.</p><p>“One, you’re the one that came to me bleeding and at death’s door. Two, you’re not even hired to be one you just want in on some action. Three, yes because you would rather go headfirst into danger, and fourth: why do you think I welcome you here anyway? You get barely drunk enough to tip Hank really well, so now he likes you.”</p><p>“And the fifth?”</p><p>“I—”</p><p>“Let’s not ruin the night, Alexandra.” He softly smiled at her. He knew that whatever is going to come out of that delectable mouth of hers would ruin one of them’s night. “Want another cup of coffee? Of course, I can talk to Hank. I’m running out of beer anyway.”</p><p>“If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather return to the office. Everything seemed to be in order here anyway.” With a nod, she walked off but not far enough to be out of earshot.</p><p>“As you wish.”</p><p>By now, he said it because he wanted to. Not because he knew that she wouldn’t get it. She never did, but it’s the only way he can say it without her running away. Or at least running a knife across his throat.</p>
<hr/><p>“Goddammit, Maliksi. Open your eyes!” If her words weren’t enough, the slap across his face sent a clear message. “Ow.” He muttered, looking over to see Alex towering over him. “What the hell did you do this time?”</p><p>“Nothing!” He said defensively. Which was true. He didn’t start the fight, but he very well finished it. “I’m not dying so can I just sleep?”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Why not?” He was drunk enough to pout. Of course, he’s a grown man, but then again, grown men can pout too. Fuck toxic masculinity.</p><p>“You got drunk and started a bar fight?”</p><p>“No.” He pouted again, “I ended a bar fight. The other one… he started it.”</p><p>“And of course you and Iglap just happened to be there?”</p><p>“Yeah.” Then he felt something stinging on his cheek. It definitely wasn’t Alex slapping him again. He opened one eye — he didn’t even know that his eyes were closed — to see that she was applying something to his face, cleaning his bruised cheek. “Ow, you’re pressing too hard.” He said. “Well, I think you’re pretty much used to the pain. Getting killed and bar fighting.”</p><p>“Hey, there should be an almost there. Almost dying.” He replied only to earn a glare from Alex. “I mean, you should see the other guy.” He defended.</p><p>“I did.”</p><p>“You did? Did you put betadine on his cuts too?” For some reason, the thought made him jealous. Which was irrational, in his mind, but it didn’t stop him from feeling it. “Don’t be ridiculous. I was there when you called me to pick you up.”</p><p>“I.. I called you?”</p><p>“Drunkenly, I might add.”</p><p>“And you came?” That was the only thing that registered in his head. It wasn’t the pain of the iodine that stung his cuts, but the fact that he called and she came.</p><p>“Would you rather I didn’t?” She asked, her touch soft and calculated. It was as if she touched him anymore he would spontaneously combust. Which he just might, given that it’s the first time she let herself be close to him. Whenever she treated his wounds, he always noticed that she kept herself at arm's length. But now their knees touch, her face inches from his and he could see that she had a look of worry on her face. It wasn’t obvious to anyone but those who care deeply for her.</p><p>He felt blessed to elicit a look like that on her for his well being.</p><p>“Apology accepted,” Maliksi said, wincing as Alex pressed against the cut on his lip rather hard.<br/>
“I didn’t apologize.”</p><p>“I know, but I forgive you for slapping me.” He closed his eyes again but he smirked as he heard her huff. “You deserved it.” She replied, her lips forming a thin line. “Please, I’ve had worse.” He said feeling her stiffen against him.</p><p>“Now, now, where are those threats vaguely thinned with concern?” He tried to make light of the situation. Because 1) he’s not used to the silence, 2) the distance with Alex is doing something to him, 3) he can’t think straight when he can smell her. Taking a deep breath, taking in her scent one last time, he held her wrist and pushed her away.</p><p>They both stood up and Maliksi buttoned up his shirt trying to look like how he did before getting his ass handed to him. “I’ll get going,” he started but the walk towards the door was slow as if he’s waiting for her to stop him. She doesn’t. Alex continued to stare at him before speaking up. “This better be the last time I have to save your ass, Mal.”</p><p>Mal turned to face her with the softest smile on his face.</p><p>“As you wish.”</p><p>Now he feared she’d never get it.</p>
<hr/><p>“If you die, I swear I’ll go to the other world to bring you back and kill you again.” Her voice sounded half threatening and half worry and he could not help but smile. But he probably couldn’t. He can’t feel his mouth moving. He wanted to tell her that he’ll be fine, he’s not dying, and that it’ll only happen once pigs fly or crows turn white.</p><p>He could feel himself slipping. Not completely, but he’s barely hanging on as it is. Those creatures really did a number on him this time. There was nothing but darkness though, which is a good thing. No light at the end of the tunnel meant he’s still way too far to see the end of it. He could hear things though. A calm voice laced with panic. Gruff mumblings. And something about getting blood on the sheets.</p><p>Any retort or cleaver quip never left his lips. He simply... existed for the time being. Jokes can wait when he does recover.</p><p>After what seemed like forever, he finally managed to open an eye. Squinting at the bright light above him. Maybe this was the end.</p><p>“Good. You’re awake.” He heard shuffling and turned his head to the side to see Alex seated next to his bed. He finally managed a grin. “Did you wait for me to wake up?”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“I’d like to think otherwise if you don’t mind.”</p><p>After a moment of silence, she was the first to break it. “I’d rather not ask what happened this time. Because it’ll only want me to throttle some sense into you.”</p><p>He coughed and immediately was by his side with a glass of water in her hand. He took a large gulp, suddenly realizing how parched he was. “Get some rest.” It was like a broken record with them. With her always saying it when he always gets into some sort of injury. If that’s how she shows her concern or she’s just being bossy, Maliksi wouldn’t know. As much as he thought he knew Alexandra Trese, there are really more layers for him to uncover.</p><p>“Where are you going?” He suddenly broke free from his thoughts when Alex made a move to the door. “I have to tell your father you’re awake.”</p><p>“Stay.” His voice broke, hoarse despite managing a glassful.</p><p>“Stay.” He pleaded again. Just when he thought she would turn her back and walk out, she turned and closed the door behind her, she walked back to his bed and sat at the side of the bed. The bed barely dipped from her weight as Maliksi took her hand. She squeezed it looking at him.</p><p>“Stay.” He said again, firmer this time, as if it wasn’t enough and she would leave him again. Alex gave him a small smile, the first of forever.</p><p>“As you wish.”</p>
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